For the last two years in October I have written a post about being tired and being a bit overwhelmed with life. See. And see again.

I am quite pleased that I managed to get through October without writing that post. I think no longer being a uni student helps not to mention my very intentional efforts to not be too busy. But alas I do not think I am going to get through November. I am tired. As the year comes to an end, I realise that I am very ready for my Christmas/January holidays. Time off work will be good, time off nominating will be even better (I am really hoping we are not expected to do much of that over Christmas) and time with very missed friends and family will be the best.

I also realise that perhaps I find pain more difficult at the end of year. Not mine this year (I really have had a very blessed year for which I am grateful) but that of those around me, of the world. The beginning of a year feels hopeful, there is energy around to try and make a difference. The end of the year seems more like waiting.

This year I have been involved in preparing liturgies for church so I have learned a lot about the Christian calender. At the end of year (as of Nov 30) we have advent which is about waiting, about preparing for the birth of Jesus. Then we have Christmas obviously about clebrating the birth of Jesus. And after that, 12 days after Christmas (Jan 6), we have Epiphany which is the day associated with the three kings visiting Jesus. This is the time to focus on our vision, on healing divisions, on newness of life. I have been thinking at some unconscious level (which has now become conscious) this calender influences me.