I have questions and doubts about almost everything to do with my faith. Even when I was a regular church goer I was never very good at saying the creeds.  Not only because I think a lot of it is irrelevant and unhelpful but to be honest I don’t think I could claim that I am 100% sure of anything.  Sometimes I envy people when they confidently claim they have no problems believing this or that when I have questions about almost everything. Despite this I journey on in the Christian faith.  I read the Bible, pray, and try to live my life in response to Jesus and trust that God is with me despite all these questions and doubts.

So I don’t think I will go into all my doubts individually in this post.  Not only are there too many but I am probably at a place where I no longer wish to seek answers to everything anyway.  I imagine a lot of the things I doubt are fairly irrelevant and I have found some fairly unconventional answers to most of the other questions that mostly suffice and the rest is just part of the great mystery of God.

I will say though probably the biggest question I have regarding my faith is “what does all the suffering in the world say about God?”.  I know it’s not very original and lots of people have tried in different ways to answer this question.  I have my own ways of answering it that make sense to me sometimes but there are other times I hear some people’s stories of one terrible tragedy after another, after another and I do wonder what trust in God means.  And often, here in Peru surrounded by so much poverty and the injustice of it, none of the explanations make sense.  But there are moments when I feel God’s presence very near and mostly they are when I am suffering or with people who are suffering and I guess that answers a bit of my question.  But not of all it.