In streetwize tonight I realised that I am bad listener. I mean I think that realisation has been coming for a little while, I mean I have had clues but tonight it was that aha moment where I could no longer deny it. Stretwise follows a format of singing songs that are yelled as we go along and then we ask a question, anything from what’s your favourite bible verse or fod or place to when did you last expereience hope or god or suffereing to if you had a maghic power or if you were an aimal what would it be. Then we read a bible verse and talk about it and then we pray. It is lots of fun, I love the variety of answers and the honesty of answers and the fun of answers but I realised tonight that I actually spend more time thinking about what I am going to say than actually listening to others. I never truly listen until I have answered. I think I do that a lot. When someone is talking I think I am always thinking about how to respond or what words of wisdom I could give. I have realised though that this is not what poeple want and really my words aren’t really as wise as would like to think. Maybe I should just learn to shut up.
I guess this has all come on because I have to do a presentation at uni tommorrow about listening. I have to present an experimental activity and a case study and give out a handout to my uni class. I am so nervous, firstly there is the teacher and the fact that I need to be good to pass, the second is that well everyone in the class is an adult educator so they will all be analysing my skills, thirdly well it is group work and of course I have been the dominating force in my group so I feel like their marks are depending on me as well and finally well the truth is I am not really very good litener myself so who the hell I am to teel anyone else about it. Bloody uni it I feel like all the assesments that I have doen have made me realise all the mistakes I have made, not only as an educator but as a human being. I just have to think. well it is only half an hour and then it will be over and it is my last class with these people so hopefully i won’t see them again.
I might finsish this with a good quote about listening.
Every person in this life has something to teach me – and as soon as I accept that I open myself to truly listening.