Some days suck and today was one of them.

Today at Monday Club two people in the club were quite abusive to eachother verbally and a little physically so they were asked to leave. One left swearing never to return and the other, someone who I have always had a really good relationship with, went up the road and started saying that he was going to kill himself. I went up to find out if he was serious to decide if we needed to call the crisis team and tried to talk to him. All he kept saying was ‘you have to let me come back I can’t handle rejection over and over’, I tried to say that wasn’t my decision but that of the club and anyway it was just for today not forever’ but in the end he said he was going to kill himself and then he shouted out that he would kill someone. At that point I went and asked them in the office to call the crisis team and of course as usual they couldn’t come and by this stage he returned to Rough Edges and had a table in his hands swearing to throw it at me so I said call the police. This was probably a bad decision but I didn’t know what else to do, I was scared and I felt really helpless. I guess I had come up against my limitations and I hated it. I so much just want to try and serve people and so often I feel like I just make things worse.

Now here I am at uni about to hand in an assessment that that I think really sux but I don’t really know what else to do with it.