She’s a Mil

I have been finding work pretty hard for the last couple of weeks. Not feeling all that inspired by the job to be totally honest and finding it so hard to get anything done. Every task seem to be constantly interrupted by another task that ends up taking a lot longer than I thought for less results than I hoped. And everyone keeps cancelling or rescheduling their meetings or ringing me to complain about something.

However, today was a good day. I had two emails from volunteers filled with thanks and praise for the organisation and the support and care they get. That on top of a good meeting was just what I needed cause I also managed to finish some things that have been in the in-tray for weeks. Not to mention book myslef two speaking engagements that I have been trying to organise for awhile.

It feels good. Hopefully the start of some more good days….

I have had a pretty busy fortnight at work but today is very slow. It is funny how that happens. I quite like busy but it is good to have a bit of a slower day. I was actually able to take a break and go across the road to my local cafe and have a coffee and sit on the lounge. It was nice. So what have I been doing? The usual sort of stuff really but some big things have been:

I spoke at a support group for carers of people with a mental illness. They were a great group of people; very real people; very exhausted and overwhelmed but kind. There was one lady however who seemed intent on backing me into a corner. I think she is just so used to being told by organisations and professionals that they can not help her that she assumes from the start that, that is going to happen so refuses to hear that you may be able to. So she just keeps pushing and pushing until you are in a place where you can no longer help. I have seen her at other meetings do the same thing to other presenters and I was told by the rest of the group that she always does it too. I think they are at a stage where they are going to ask her not to attend as she is now causing others to not want to come and making it an unsafe place for them. It was quite sad. It was pretty hard for me but a good experience and I am glad it happened in a place where the rest of the audience was very supportive.

I also went along with a volunteer and her friend to Mix 106.5 as they were been interviewed for a project called the Thank you project. It is a project in which people are given the opportunity to thank people in their lives who have really helped them in some way. It is pretty cheesy but kinda nice. Anyway we were asked if someone would like to do that and this pair agreed. It was very moving for me to hear how far this person has come since being with her friend. She talked about how five years ago (before they met) she rarely got out of bed and when she did life was pretty miserable. She was distant from her family and the community. Now she feels excited about life. She and her friend do volunteer work together and she is doing a TAFE course. She has reconnected with her family and last month attended her nephew’s birthday party. She thanked her friend for supporting her and encouraging her but not doing things for her; for believing her. She thanked her for being a true friend. I am sure that all this can not be attributed to this program but it is exciting to think that it was a part of it.

I have possibly said this (or something similiar) on this blog before but I want to say it again as it is important. There really is not enough support in this country, probably the world, for people who have a mental illness and their carers.

This morning I attended a breakfast and a talk put on by ARAFMI (the association of relatives and friends of the mentally ill) and I was very moved. I go along to these things sometimes. My bosses let me go to “network”. I really do hate networking but I do think it is important to get out there and hear people’s stories. I think sometimes I get so involved in what I am doing that I forget about the bigger picture. I think I also forget how much stigma there is about mental illness. Obviously working in this area almost everyone I associate with is pretty educated on the issues and most of my “lefty” friends are too so it suprises me to hear stories of such prejudice.

So I will finish this by saying some things that address some of the stigmas I heard people facing this morning. Probably most of the people who read this blog will know but just in case.

1 in 5 Australians will experience a mental illness in their lifetime.
People receiving treatment for a mental illness are no more violent or dangerous than the average population.
There is no definitive answer on what causes mental illness so people who have one are not necessarily drug users or their parents did not necessarily abuse them.
Schizophrenia is not the same as pyschopath.
Mental illness is an illness, like cancer or diabetes. It does not indicate fault or weakness on the part of the person who has it.

I don’t think my interview is going to show up. That is the second one in a row. It is very annoying. I mean there is no way people would just not show up to a job interview. I think people think because it is volunteer work it doesn’t matter. That attitude annoys me. I mean just ring.

It must be the January thing. I have had so much initial interest this month. 21 enquiries, that’s the most I have ever had but not a lot of follow through. I guess people make new years resolutions to volunteer but then by the end of January they have given up.

I have another interview at 6.30pm. I think I am going to go and ring her to make sure she shows up. I would be very angry if I stayed behind and she didn’t come.

So today is my last day. Like many others I will be off for the Christmas period, returning to work on 2nd January. Not bad, I get 11 days off while only taking four days annual leave. Yay for me. We are going to Tamworth to spend Christmas with my dad for four days but the rest of it I am just going to hang at home, go to the beach or coffee shops or movies or read or other kind of adventures. Mum and Keith will be around so that is fun too. I am very tired today so looking forward to the break.

Work is very quiet though, haven’t had much to do the last couple of days. I guess it’s not really the time of year when people are thinking about taking up a new long term volunteering opportunity. And all the ones that are in the middle of the process want to put it on hold until next year. I had visions of using this time to redesighn some of the posters and forms and things that I think need a bit of a rejig but I have been waiting for bosses approval on things for over a month now and I am tired of chasing her up about it. So I guess I might head our for another longer lunch.

Finding it hard to get motivated at work. Lots of jobs I do not want to do today and boy oh boy have I managed to procrastinate. All non urgent, not very important jobs are done. Inbox is pretty empty. And I have spent way too much time on the net. My facebook page has all these added applications and now I am blogging. It is silly really cause if I had just done them when I got in, they would probably be over and I would feel much better.

Today I am going away for 2 nights for the national conference for the organisation I work for. I have probably in previous posts mentioned the name of this organisation but have been reading all about people who have lost their jobs because of their blogs so I am being a bit more careful. I am quite looking forward to it. I speak to so many of these people on the phone so it will be good to meet them. Also good to get to know my colleagues better too. They are really good women I think, I am very lucky. Also looking forward to getting some kind of continuity happning. Although we are all under the one logo we all do different things so it will be good to get the best things from each program and come up with a uniform process.

It is happening at Collaroy Beach and was also looking forward to walks on the beach in the evening and swims but given I have torn the ligaments in my foot and am on crutches that may not be happening. What a shame.

Yesterday we had training. It was a pretty long (7.30 -5) and exhasting day but we invited a volunteer and her friend to come along and talk to us and they were so great. They had such an obvious and genuine affection and respect for each other, it was lovely. The friend shared very openly about her experiences, many of which were pretty horrendous, and about how helpful she found her volunteer. It very much reinspired me about what I do and I needed that.

I have been back at work for just over two weeks today and I finally feel like things are back under my control. It’s a nice feeling I tell you what. I have been feeling a little bit stressed about it all. Although don’t get me wrong still much prefer to be busy than have nothing to do.

Anyway this my celebratory post. Yay.

They are doing renovations at work so that has meant for me lots of noise with concrete cutters and hammers and other renovation tools that make lots of noise. It is a little anoying but it will be good once it is done. It also means that we don’t have a kitchen right now so the table and fridge and watever else have all been set up in the space right outside my office.

This has been good in that I have gotton to know some of the really lovely and kind people who give up their time to work in the shops but unfortunatlely today it has proved to be quite distressing. It seems that a small group of our volunteers are complete racists. Today I heard about the “stupid people who don’t speak English” and “the mean, nasty muslims who are the cause of the world’s problems” not to mention “the dole bludgers who take advantage of the society” and questions about how we are going to ensure that poeple don’t get more than one hamper. It made me so angy. I just can’t believe that attitude and especially not here where the motto we follow is “be kind and love for love is your first gift to the poor”. Here where we are told “do not blame the poor”. And here where it is Jesus Christ that we follow.

Of course by the time I had formulated a response in my head and had calmed myself down enough not to be nasty as well the conversation had finished and I had lost my opportunity to say something. Not that I would probably have the guts to anyway but these kind of attitudes upset me so and I feel I must say say something beacuse it is probably not nastiness that leads to these kind of attitudes but ignorance.